This morning I woke up excited to see what’s happened in blog-world since I went to bed. Being in Australia means the majority of the English-speaking world (Britain, America, even South Africa) tends to be awake while I’m asleep. So I got up, feeling pretty good while reading the comments on my own blog and the posts from other blogs I followed, and then something strange happened.
My mind became submersed in this idea that I had nothing interesting left to say.
I tried to think about what else I could blog about, but my brain only produced boring things. Like porridge. Yes, I tried to write a post about porridge. I tried to write a poem about porridge. Why am I still writing about porridge?!
I had to leave the computer. I made a cup of tea. I came back, closed my blog and tried to remember why I loved this painfully challenging practice just twenty minutes ago. Then it hit me – I was trying too hard. I don’t need to be trying to write a future blog post right this minute. I should just go back to what I enjoyed about blogging in the first place – reading.
People need all sorts of things for inspiration. For me, as soon as I went back to reading a book, then back to reading blogs I followed, the pressure was released. I had thoughts again (phew!). I was engaged in what other people were doing. I commented. I read comments. And I relaxed.
Crisis over, I was surprised it had happened in the first place. It was like I was suddenly overwhelmed by this unnecessary expectation. I had forgotten to have fun. That’s what we’re all here for right? Entertainment. Engagement (not the wedding kind; the engaging with the community kind). Escapism.
I feel a bit stupid now, but I still wanted to write this. This is full-circle closure. I am writing a blog post about not being able to write a blog post.
And I’m happy again 🙂
P.S. I am going to keep that porridge post in my hard-drive, as a reminder to not take things so bloody seriously.